October 31, 2012

the anniversary of letting go

No one ever congratulated me for letting go, but I started to a year ago today... I recall the day since for about a month I lost sight of colors, it was all blue, greyish at times.

October 28, 2012

on another note

If you ask me, I think you're both fools to have fallen in love.

On another note, I wish I was a fool.

October 27, 2012

the plans for the future

So I'll drink a cup of tea while the whirl of thoughts settles down, if they ever do I'll stand up and keep going.

on staying up

I was ready to go sleep, tired of a long day, reintroducing myself to the mathematical lingo I'd forgotten, but you asked me to stay for a little while and I did. I stayed up for you, and you know how much I love to sleep.

October 24, 2012

the moon and the stars

He promised the moon and the stars, an entire galaxy I'm sure...He was full of words, the right ones I mean, the ones that fit perfectly in your heart. But galaxies weren't his to promise away, still he did, it was easy. His heart was his but he never promised to give it away, I guess he knew he couldn't hold his end of the bargain.

the perfect wonderland

Gushing dark green trees,
white lilies and purple daze,
where the birds never tire of singing,
and they know the most fitting tunes,
where the sky is as blue as the room you grew up in,
and the clouds are scarce since the rain wouldn't dare spoil this,
in this perfect wonderland
we could question why our past was gray,
and forget, just forget.

October 22, 2012

matter that doesn't matter anymore

And then one day I forgot to call you, and one day became a week, and a month, and a year.  It didn't matter where you were or with whom, not anymore... It didn't matter that I cried so much that night I couldn't even walk, it didn't matter I wrote to you and about you, it didn't matter that my feelings lasted for years, it didn't matter that friends and family told me over and over you weren't right, it didn't matter that I never attended your birthdays and neither did you to mine, it didn't matter that our lives came together just for a little while. It didn't matter because it didn't hurt anymore,  it didn't bring joy either...

October 21, 2012

the weather was set

That night,
that betrayal,
those feelings that rose,
my face turning red with anger, 
the deception, 
the scar on my fist,
that first tear...

That night set the weather for my whole life.

October 12, 2012

here we go

Here we go again with the making distance and the I don't really care's, it's all pretend. Why can't we just face it? We do care, we like each other, it's freaking scary but it is how it is. I used to take pride on running away, now I wish you could understand it doesn't help, running away doesn't help.


There's a feeling in the air, it's full of hope and answers. 
October, I'm glad you're here.

October 7, 2012

the right amount of crazy

Those days where you drive me the right amount of crazy are the ones I enjoy the most. Maybe it had been a long time since we last met and the time bomb was clicking, maybe I've missed you, maybe it's just what happens when we're together, it doesn't really matter as long as it doesn't stop.

dig, dig, dig

I'm digging out the weed so the flowers will bloom,
once they're out, they'll bloom, they'll bloom...
And they will be wonderful, colorful, beautiful,
but mostly they'll be mine, all mine.

scary things

It's scary to try, but it's even scarier not to.